When a person begins to look for ways to stop suffering and become happy, the main work happens on the second, as more desirable. In principle, everyone is willing to endure recurring adversity, to cope with suffering, if this is followed by a period of bright or prolonged happiness. The urgency of the issue increases when a person has all the necessary opportunities for joy, but at the same time he chooses to suffer. Logic, comments of others and reading the relevant literature leads to a possible option of own responsibility in the level of suffering.
For a new relationship with the universe, it is necessary to reconsider negative thoughts that contribute first to lowering the mood, and then strengthening the negative position. The search for the root causes of the state of torture of one’s own soul should be the first, but if not the person himself winds himself up, but really there is a reason for suffering, then it is necessary to deal with the result.
How to stop suffering and start to enjoy life
To stop suffering and start living in a new way is a task that represents a difficulty only at the first stage, while suffering has a benefit. Considering everything in dark colors, intensifying your own pain and continuing to live in a state of despair when the way out is as close as possible is just a habit of building life in this way. Being joyful and successful has always been more difficult than a suffering loser, because it requires not only the ability to notice the beautiful in every moment (as most articles on the joy of life advise), but also to create moments and things that enthrall you in pleasure and happiness.
Instead of torturing yourself with painful experiences, you need to change your life, make it active, and the vector in this activity should be aimed at self-realization and promotion of ideas that bring happiness.
Reorganize your day so that in the evening you are exhausted from pleasant fatigue, and during the day were laid out to the fullest. Happiness has no end point, because it is a process and the more intense the life of a person is, the closer he gets to the realization of his mission, the less he suffers. A similar approach is found in both psychological and esoteric schools, spiritual teachings and religions - the more immersion into inactivity from the destination, the less energy is given to it, the less level of happiness it is able to live.
When suffering begins to seem intolerable or is delayed for a long time, where there is no end in sight or a decrease in intensity, it is necessary to direct your inner gaze towards suffering. Attempts to distract, to pretend that these experiences do not belong to you are unlikely to help overcome negative feelings. If you endure the living injuries and pain for the future, then the accumulated energy will not go anywhere, but it may well break a person from the inside.
When a conscious way to meet their experiences is chosen, they are legalized and there is no more internal conflict, the situation becomes available for transformation. It is this recognition, the ability to look at the factors causing suffering, to recognize how painful it is of what is going to help in the end to gain new experience, to benefit, to find solutions. Only the recognition of the situation, and possibly help yourself instead of resistance will give comfort. Instead of holding a mask of positive and grin instead of a smile, it is better to dive as deeply as possible into the experiences of negative, then at the end the light will shine, because the psyche cannot suffer for a long time in intensive mode, but will require the release of these emotions.
When emotions are recognized, and their purpose is determined, it is necessary to structure this process by setting clear goals, both for the next day and for several years. A long-term perspective is necessary in order to give our activities the correct vector, and not to spin like a weather vane every new morning. Daily tasks help to maximize their potential, while it is important that the plan is diverse and aimed not only at the realization of their talents and the maximum squeezing of forces. Try to have in each day a few minutes devoted to the pain that occurred - let it be sessions with a psychotherapist or yoga, swimming or walking.
The main thing is that you do not forbid yourself to live the pain while you are moving towards happiness - cry, release negative experiences, but let it happen in a clearly defined time frame (for example, take a few hours in the evening, and then gradually reduce this gap), and the rest of the time, devote the transformation of your life to a happy side.
Instructions on how to stop torturing yourself and suffering
Analytical thinking, as well as objective criticism of the emotional sphere, can be turned off during periods of suffering suffering in relation to any situations that have developed. This requires clear guidelines to help you get to a level where you can already connect awareness and creative ways to adapt to the new conditions.
Initially, choose a setting for future happiness, and the belief that everything that happens also keeps you away from suffering. You do not need to forcibly write out the advantages of your life, comparing them with the difficulties of African children, since even the emotional pain from the end of a relationship will not get away from realizing the fact of a complete refrigerator of food. But keep in mind the philosophical idea that all the events taking place are developing in the most correct and good way for you. It is necessary to open the door of perception to positive changes, try to find out exactly how the misfortune that has happened can be useful in the future, from what saves, helps. Here, perspective thinking helps a lot, as the situation may produce unexpectedly positive results.
In addition to changing the passive position of contemplation and expectation of good changes, it is necessary to begin to act in the context of the found good directions. The human psyche is such that all negative events are imprinted faster, the good usually remains within the normal range. Such a device helps to survive in adverse conditions, but also prolongs the experience of suffering. Here you can deceive your own brain, if you start to act and adjust the found options for a good resolution of the situation or tracks that have opened and lead to gain. The position is more energy-consuming, than to expect everything to change itself, but the mental anguish recedes into the background.
Work with negative experiences no more than the indicated time (define it in advance). It is not necessary to contact a psychotherapist, but it is necessary to arrange such therapeutic sessions yourself. The important point is to reduce the touch to the sore spot, because the habit is formed on the basis of repetitive actions.
The habit of thinking about the negative is also shaped, like a late rise and smoking. The more often you complain about what happened, the greater the need to behave this way further. If you call a friend every night to talk about your pain, then in a week it will be dependent on your own complaint. You just lose the opportunity to speak on other topics and out of habit continue to complain to others, the brain at this time forms negative emotions, because the command was given that everything is bad.
It is important to take care of yourself, only to actually do, and not to create appearance. When you try to feed yourself with cakes, so as not to cry - this is not a concern, because the level of sugar, cholesterol increases, weight increases, and as a result you make your body worse. If you leave yourself at home without going to the premieres, for new things and just taking a walk with friends, you are depriving yourself of new impressions, and only with new experiences and emotions, perhaps, to rebuild the emotional background. Let the care be real, and if you need to go to the gym, go to the doctor’s painful procedure, end an unpleasant relationship, do it — the less negativity and unfinished business you have in your life, the less psychic energy will go there. So, there will be forces to create joy.
Try to do good, help those in need, participate in charity or independently invent the necessary actions. Socially useful work, help someone shows the possibility of changing the world for the better, gives thanks to people and new friends. Even if you don’t want to talk now, you can paint a shop, collect garbage, install a swing. This is done to see the joy of others and to feel that you yourself can change the world.
How to stop suffering because of men and be killed because of love
The main subject of women's complaints relates to how to stop suffering for a man, and it doesn’t matter what caused this suffering.
The female psyche is such that the main point is the relationship, which means that the tragedies associated with men and feelings towards them bring the greatest pain and experience. To stop all experiences beyond the norm, you must learn to leave on time, say no, defend your internal boundaries. The fact that it does not stop suffering for a man who does not need is not love, but a heavy emotional dependence, the roots of which can be spent on psychotherapy sessions for a single day.
It is necessary to formulate for oneself what a happy relationship is and compare it with the existing ones. Do not try to hide behind the ideas proclaimed by a man, bend your line and do not fall for manipulation. It is because of the fact that a woman fully bends and goes against her nature, she suffers from what should not and there is suffering. When you work for relationships, maintain them, or for a man, while scoring on your own emotional and mental state, it’s time to sound the alarm.
If you do not have time to sleep and relax, meet with friends and buy yourself what you want, when tears become a normal part of life - you need to leave this relationship. Considering that it is worth a little patience, the relationship will be adjusted, the greatest mistake is committed. So only sufferings are prolonged, but at the same time they do not remember that there will be no more suffering at break. See how much time will be free if you get rid of love that brings pain and what kind of joy this time can be spent on. Of course, the first time will be painful, but then every hour your unique life with your needs and joys will return to you. And with it the feeling of life will return.
A method of comparison, such as therapeutic visits, helps a lot from suffering. Even if you are not going to leave the relationship, then go with someone else to spend a free evening and feel the difference - it is necessary that you feel your desires, and then express them to the partner whose relationship you want. When you invent love for yourself, completely surrender to a person, and then you suffer it is useful to remember that real feelings are not only necessarily mutual, but must also bring contentment, comfort, comfort, and not eternal drama and showdown.