How to calm down, if you are very nervous, it becomes a pressing issue of everyday life. External conditions throw more and more stress, and the internal system is not ready for processing and environmentally friendly response to the resulting load. But from such a general state of humanity it is worth looking for a way out in an independent determination of the area that causes your discomfort personally and makes you nervous. Conventionally, it is possible to designate several general reasons that are decomposed into separate individual ones.
Increased sensitivity to the responses of the outside world increases the threshold of nervousness and the likelihood of a stressful situation. With developed egocentrism, the inability to perceive criticism, the desire to take everything even everyday worries at one's own expense can cause nervous feelings (when a crowd laughs, thoughts arise, not over you, the disapproving look and rudeness of the seller are perceived as a personal insult). Reducing the importance of the opinions of others and the desire of everyone to cause only a positive assessment significantly reduces stress levels, saves a lot of energy and establishes true contact with reality, where it turns out that it doesn’t matter to everyone what you are doing and how you look.
The desire to constantly receive pleasure, bring things to an ideal state, complete independence and increased responsibility can provoke a chronic high level of internal tension. In this state, everything is able to ruffle, not to mention the significant problems. Therefore, the constant attention to the level of its workload and emotional comfort, the search for its own sources of stress relief, is relevant, in a crisis situation not to look for options on how to quickly calm down and not be nervous.
How to calm down and stop being nervous - tips from a psychologist
Look for options on how to calm down, if you are very nervous you can be long and carefully, some you will drop because of their duration, some because of inaccessibility, some because of reluctance. In fact, it is possible to deny it for a long time and with the help of any excuses, but in practice there are a sufficient number of ways to cope with the nervous nerves quite simply and quickly.
In the fight against nervousness, sport, physical exertion and body work in general is an invaluable ally, since it is the somatic side that takes the maximum part in responding to the resulting nervous tension, changing the hormonal balance and processing the released adrenaline. Make in your daily routine, if not a full-fledged workout, then exercise or walking, instead of sitting in front of the screen and driving. The more movements you make, the more opportunities your nervous system will receive to process the accumulated stress. After a hard conversation or an unpleasant event, when the passions inside have not subsided, it will help to throw out negative emotions by jogging or beating the pear, and then you can arrange a relaxation session in the form of stretch marks, massage or quiet lying and conscious relaxation of muscles.
In addition to physical activity our body, which means that the psyche depends on water metabolism and fullness of the body. The common advice to drink some water, no matter how ridiculous it may seem, is one of the most effective, even in situations of serious and extreme stressful situations. In an adrenal crisis, the body needs more water to normalize the level of the jumped hormone, you can add a sweetener to the water, because stressful situations include increased brain work on finding a way out of the situation, and this work involves glucose absorption. Replenishing hydrolysis and glucose balance helps the body to normalize faster. In addition to crisis conditions, drinking ordinary water helps to avoid dehydration (almost a universal phenomenon in the modern world), which, at its pronounced stage, strengthens the experiences of anxiety and fear. In general, the orientation to the needs of your body and the subtle feeling of its changes can prompt your personal ways to calm down quickly and not be nervous.
In a situation where you are unnerving directly at the moment, and you need to respond calmly, try to distract from the words and intonations flying in your direction and concentrate on something outside. You can control your internal attention not only by directing it to the conflict, but by switching it to consider the details of tailoring your neighbor's jacket and thinking about where to get the same buttons, you automatically leave the nervous situation by a few percent. Ideally, the annoying situation should be left completely, not only mentally, i.e. if you meet the former at a party and cannot calmly react, then leave, if the boor has got into the habit of taking you out of mental balance with comments in the social network, then throw him into the ban. Trying to endure and trying to create an imaginary image of a well-bred person should not be confused with adjustment and the desire to be comfortable. In any situation, your living space and spiritual well-being - your care and responsibility, superheroes who save you from hassle, will not appear.
If, having got out of an unpleasant situation, your nerves are still strained like ropes, then you can fight the remaining tension by plunging into other matters. It’s worth choosing them in such a way that you can go completely into another world - watching a movie here is hardly suitable, because the same mental scrolling of events will continue in your head as you would without it. A sports game, solving intrigues among friends, a trip to the suburbs for new photos - an active, dynamic, completely enthralling you and igniting a fire of excitement.
Crying and laughter help you to stop being nervous - with the help of the first one, you release excessive tension and get a wonderful result of mental ease after half an hour of sobbing, while using other methods you can spend a day; and with the help of the second (especially sarcasm, irony, black humor), the situation is reduced in importance, and perhaps even acquires new outlines and nuances.
Learn how your personal nervousness is arranged, what catches you, and what helps to stay normal. Situations that threaten your peace of mind can be tried to eliminate, edit into acceptable forms or prepare for them. Naturally, to be fully armed and never get into a frenzy is not subject to anyone, but you can minimize the damage by studying your own inner world, sore spots and blind spots, as well as doing prophylactic ongoing support of the nervous system. Maintaining and taking care of oneself is not a big deal and includes quite general principles of healthy nutrition and saturation with various microelements, maintaining an activity regime, caring for the quality of sleep and rest.
How to learn to calm down and not be nervous after a quarrel?
A quarrel, especially with close people, knocks out of balance, but at the same time it requires quick calm, so that subsequent constructive dialogue and the search for ways of reconciliation are possible. During nervous excitement, our breathing changes, and calm should begin with stabilization of the respiratory process. During a quarrel, we tend to breathe often, too deeply, exposing the body to hyperventilation, then within a few minutes you need to control the duration of inhalation and exhalation, forcibly stretching the duration and normalizing the depth. If the quarrel is frightening, then an involuntary stop of breathing due to reflex mechanisms is possible (to lie low, to pretend to be dead, so as not to suffer). Restore the integrity and coherence of breathing - your task is to achieve breathing without pauses, so that the breath smoothly flows into the exhalation.
You can leave the house to air. It is important to inform your partner that you will return after restoring calm, so that your behavior is not misunderstood. During the walk, you will be able to assess the situation without the influence of another person and emotional pressure; you can also relieve emotional tension by running, shouting, tearing the paper. If you don’t have the opportunity to retire physically from the common space, then take a time out in clarifying the relationship, let it be half an hour of silence, during which no one claims, and does not tolerate it. Stopping and getting out of the active phase of the conflict will help restore their condition, reduce the amount of time required for rehabilitation, and also save them from unnecessary words, decisions and actions made under the influence of the senses.
In the period after a quarrel, when the mandrass does not let you go, pay attention to the voltage drop. If you have misplaced some words, then write them in a letter (then reread in a calm state and decide whether to show it to the addressee), feelings can be expressed in colors, movement. If there is an opportunity and an appropriate level of trust, then you can talk the situation over with a friend, just don’t ask for advice, but ask for support. Contact with water helps to get rid of negative experiences - take a shower, wash off a nervous negative, or at least rinse your face or palms, hold them under running water - will give a bit of calm, break in rushing thoughts.
Removing stress after a quarrel with alcoholic beverages may seem like a tempting idea, especially for those for whom the showdown ended in a break, but resorting to this option is undesirable. Negative feelings will not survive, and push deep into the psyche, the problems will not be solved, but the physical and mental state may deteriorate.
Keep in mind that quarrels are a normal process for a relationship. If it is easy for us to remain always friendly with unfamiliar people, then this is only because of the short contact time and common pretensions, and even if someone encroaches on the meaningful for you, then clarifying the relationship cannot be avoided. In an intimate relationship, an indicator of closeness and the process of lapping to each other, who how this period passes depends on the mental characteristics and capabilities of people, but there is no relationship without quarrels. Only that which makes a complaint can make you happy, swears and tries to do good to a person who is not indifferent to you. We don’t spend our neurons on indifferent ones.