Straightness is the tendency of an individual not to take into account the personal characteristics of an interlocutor, encroaching on his rights with one-sided judgments that are devoid of the necessary sensitivity and flexibility. Straightness as a character trait is that an individual endowed with this quality is able to speak the truth in person, showing everything as it really is. This trait is worthy of the highest praise. Straight people at the same time fear and respect.
Of course, a person should be able to stand up for himself, express his most courageous thoughts, but if we consider the reaction of society to this character trait, then excessive straightness can become the object of outright hostility. Therefore, with age, many people try to eliminate this quality of personality, relying on established social norms.
Straightness in a relationship contributes to "building a wall of misunderstanding" between partners. Since such a trait of character is expressed in the ability of an individual to speak out on any occasion, at the same time, without trying to smooth out "sharp corners." In this case, the interlocutor has a desire to avoid contact with such a person.
What does straightness mean?
In cases of straightness, there is no such quality as tolerance. Tolerance refers to the quality of a person, expressed in a tendency to display a benevolent and respectful attitude towards a different way of life, worldview, beliefs, beliefs, habits, opinions, traditions, behavior and shortcomings of other people.
Straightness is the lack of flexibility and softness in communication. Synonyms for straightforwardness are sincerity, honesty, frankness, harshness, directness, truthfulness, straightforwardness.
For straightness three things are important: goodness, ignorance, or passion. The whole character of straightness depends on the influence of which of the listed energy is an individual. A gracious individual is pure in consciousness. This moment of principle and the straightforwardness of the individual in goodness is manifested in a transparent, clear form of truthful truthfulness.
Straightness does not mean that the individual, under the guise of honesty, offends others, but the person speaks humble truth. In this case, humility is a victory over your false ego. There is no egoism in the words of the benevolent individual, his false ego is disabled. His judgments, whatever he says, do not touch the false ego of the interlocutor. At the contact of two false ego conflicts arise, misunderstandings, disputes. The ego of one person straightforwardly expresses and touches with his disrespectfulness, as well as the lack of kindness, another ego, which is instantly excited, manifesting itself in secret malice, resentment, or open protest. A person in goodness, endowed with true knowledge, treats all living things equally well. For her, good is always in the first place. First, good - then principles, directness, truthfulness and straightforwardness. The individual in goodness believes that without respect and kindness towards people, straightforwardness should not sound, therefore his directness does not offend anyone or humiliate him. The purpose of a conversation with another person is to bring him benevolence, warmth and joy. Otherwise, this conversation turns into an interrogation, a desire to assert oneself at the expense of others, a showdown, to show one’s significance.
The straightness of an individual under the influence of the energy of passion is the included ego. Being in passion, a person cannot have a pure consciousness, it is imbued to varying degrees with the “poison” of egoism, pride, and self-interest. Such a person is unfriendly, disrespectful to people, care about them is alien to him. In order for the individual’s straightforwardness to meet the requirements of transparency, clarity, honesty, truthfulness, and humility, he must be freed from mental duality and be without pride.
A person in passion expresses directness, hiding behind simplicity and honesty, thereby not respecting the interlocutor and not asking himself the question: "Do you really want to know this truth?"
A restless mind, insatiable feelings, agitated, swollen ego turn the directness of the individual into passion into a vivid demonstration of tactlessness and intolerance. As a rule, the straightforwardness of people in passion is tactless, indelicate and ill-mannered. The person, being covered with sincere honesty, wishes to live exclusively for himself. Such a person does not care about laws, he has no respect, conscience and shame. In his understanding of being straightforward, this means cutting the uterine truth, speaking without thinking that the interlocutor is humiliating and painful. Such straightforwardness is transformed into rudeness, into rudeness, into direct insults.
Is straightness good or bad?
Why do people lose their straightness with age? What are the reasons why society forces people to openly lie? What is it? Way of survival or adaptation of people in the modern world?
Up to a certain point, each child is straightforward and gives out the truth according to his spontaneity and childish innocence. Understanding relatives perceive it amusingly, although they are sometimes awkward. With age, a person learns to understand that there is a culture of communication, tact, decency, vulnerable self-esteem of the interlocutor. All this is included in the communication skills, social norms, the ability to like, to have an interlocutor, to make an impression.
Behind the mask of good breeding, in order not to offend someone, sometimes an individual learns to openly lie, cheat and flatter, in order not to appear a talker and uncultured boor. A person often creates a "pink" illusion, both for his close social circle and for himself.
Straight people do not particularly like, and admire them, until they themselves are in the center of their attention. This happens because a person is afraid of real life and protects his "pink clouds". It is more pleasant for a person to hear a lie about love than the truth that he has long bored his loved one.
Human relations, rules and norms of communication, the line between good and bad is all quite relative. On the one hand, the far-fetched compliment about irresistible makes it impossible for a person to immediately change his image, and on the other, he raises the individual's self-esteem, faith in himself and he really begins to feel better, radiating confidence.
You can stop taking offense at the directness of the interlocutor, if we recall that this is just his subjective point of view, because, as many people exist, so many opinions. Often, a person himself creates situations when, by demonstrating vulnerability, fear and insecurity, another individual does not tell him what he really is.
And if the interlocutor with low self-esteem, then it will not be possible to wait for a direct answer from him, since the ability to express his point of view and say "no" can only strong, confident and straightforward people in themselves.
Most people try to avoid the owner of a straightforward quality, because they do not want to start a quarrel. But it often goes to her, if a straightforward individual tries to convey his opinion without worrying about the feelings of his interlocutors.
How to get rid of straightness?
Disguise the quality of straightness is not so difficult. This is a skill development issue. If you make a little effort, everything can turn out. A straightforward person can pay attention not only to the shortcomings of others, but also to trace herself. You need to learn to stop yourself in time if you want to say something extra. By practicing, pulling yourself over the extra word you can get rid of straightness. Understanding where it is better to remain silent comes with experience, relating actions and results to which they lead.
Many people believe that straightforwardness is not worth fighting for, and most appreciate this quality in people, but there are still times when straightforwardness is not appropriate. Therefore, simple control of inappropriate utterances and personal opinions, hidden behind a mask of tact and politeness, will help in the fight against straightforwardness.