Psychology and Psychiatry

How to become kinder

How to become kinder? Kindness, due to the mercantilization of most goals, leaves everyday life, and is reproached by many, being called spinelessness. Therefore, this quality, valued highly earlier, soared in price today with the truth of its manifestation against the background of anger. Even girls, whose nature initially contains less aggressiveness (hormonally), notice changes in their reactions, hear criticism from their elders and seek advice on how to become good.

Kindness is not in simultaneous actions, rather, it is a vital concept of actively bringing a piece of light into the world, without selfish expectation. Knowing how to become kind and sweet, and showing kindness, the girl draws (or creates) an aura where she breathes easier and happier, others also feel her, she becomes more optimistic and funnier, looks better, becomes healthier. But, in addition to such explicable logical interconnection of things, events also occur when a good deed is rewarded, albeit not directly by the same person, and not of the same form by help, but having done a good thing, the good comes back. Here you will believe in the karmic laws of the universe, and in energy justice, although it can be explained by the attraction of radiation, and the desire of people to be closer to kindness.

How to become a kind person?

With a psychological distance from each other, people become more embittered in their closeness, not noticing that it is kindness that opens many doors, achieve success and build more harmonious relationships.

Tips on how to become a kind person are quite simple in their sound and you cannot catch insight from the suddenly discovered truth, but in spite of this, live, guided by the principles of kindness every day and in any situation, not everyone can do it.

By developing your own kindness, help the people around you everywhere. It is easier for someone to help strangers, and for someone's family - both are hard work and it is impossible to estimate who is easier, because it is harder to guess for someone else, but it happens that it is impossible to extend a hand to relatives because of unforgiven offenses. Even if once a day you perform one act that improves the lives of others, you gradually train yourself to show your own kindness, and you also get your own piece of positive from the gratitude of people or understanding that the world has become a bit better. In order to better cope and perform such actions without being affected and forced to work on developing your own positive thinking - often help looks like support or encouragement, how to raise a person's mood, and if you automatically think positive, you will spread it around you.

But some people do not need to train kindness, they just have to release their own closed framework of anger and discontent. This happens when a person underestimates himself, self-deprecates, because if it's hard to endure yourself and love, it can be far from the outside world. Likewise, with huge amounts of annoying factors or with a constant occupation of an unloved affair, bit by bit the bad and annoying work, rubbing up shoes and neighbors, sticking their nose into personal life, draw out energy, the ability to rejoice and the desire to help. Start with kindness to yourself - take pity, praise, buy delicious, pamper the bathroom, throw away disfiguring or inconvenient things, in a word, do everything that will improve your comfort personally. Love yourself and take care of your own needs, so when you yourself get enough love and joy you will be able to share it with others, and naturally, without hesitation how to take shape.

Do not limit the display of your kindness to certain comfortable situations and people demanding it. In society, it is customary to take care of people with disabilities and the elderly, but it is not customary for a girl crying in the subway to stretch a napkin, people are also used to donating money to beggars at temples, but few people can buy a can of paint and update the benches near their own home. There are no accepted places and situations for taking care and kindness, moreover, those that are considered to be demanding it are usually devalued, and a person in real trouble eventually jumps off the bridge, because people helping shelters and retirees passed by his pain.

How to become kinder and calmer?

Working with your own inner world helps to become kinder, remember when you are in a benevolent disposition, full of inspiration and happy, people admire you, and you seek to please them just like that, and the ideas themselves come to mind. In the presence of a crisis period in life, a lack of time and resources, it’s quite natural to develop a state where nerves pass literally because of every little thing. If everything is overwhelmed and the objectively existing situation makes you nervous, and peace of mind is lost, this does not mean that you have turned into a cruel boy, but indicates an urgent need to revise your own rhythm of life and direction.

How to become kinder? Spend time exploring your own soul, perhaps you will find there are many not lived offenses, received betrayals - not paying attention to such spiritual wounds, you make them bleed nonstop, and life turns into a ring where you are constantly in a protective stance and beat first, not especially understanding with what intentions a man came. You can react this way, or you can pull the traumatic experience out, analyze and look at everything critically, extracting new strategies. It may turn out that you can still be trusted, but it is worth picking up a comfortable speed of convergence, and most of the compliments are quite sincere and dictated by the desire to please you and cheer up, and are not sarcasm and subtle irony. Calming our own demons, recognizing their existence, we get to know and understand the possibility of different response options that are available to us, if we look more widely.

Researching your own temper and aggressiveness can lead to the discovery of a lack of concern for your own needs (this is when everyone has already gotten up with their own requirements, and your own head is not washed for the tenth day), vulnerability (when the ultimate tone is too rough for you and you respond to this as aggression ), violation of your personal boundaries (when people no longer understand the verbal adequate warning and force you to be sharper), etc. There are many options, but they are all about the instability of your emotional state, asu dissatisfaction, rather than the presence or absence of goodness.

How to become kinder to people if they are besyat?

Hypersensitivity to environmental influences is revealed in intolerance to certain human manifestations, or people in general begin to enrage, I want to seat everyone in the agreed places, distribute books and demand deathly silence, otherwise their inner thin, surprising and sensitive nature is too traumatized by their gross and inappropriate manifestations. of life. It would seem that it looks like vulnerability and sensuality, but it hides behind such heightened irritability towards others its own well-groomed egoism, when people are required to internally and externally correspond to the way you are comfortable, otherwise anger, irritation and no kindness.

To such painful sensitivity, which leads to the fact that others are enraged, leads to unnecessary concern for the delivery of happiness and comfort to oneself — needs become very subtlely nuanced, and the world becomes torture, since it is infinitely far from what was invented and required by selfish needs.

In such situations, the circle of attention is closed on one’s own dissatisfaction, and at the same time all sensitivity is lost as to one’s true needs (there’s a mental image, ideally) and to other people. The development of sensitivity, the desire to understand the needs of another person are the leading way out of a state where everyone is besyat. Through the understanding of others, the understanding of oneself will gradually return, as the irritation experienced from other people is irritation from oneself, deeply hidden by the subconscious and not allowed to be aware, but trying to escape through the projections.

Thus, it is possible to go around because it’s quite difficult to break into your own subconscious, you can try to understand exactly what is required for the person who is most enraged, guess the true motivation of such actions that irritate you and, if possible, give it to him. It may turn out that your stupid colleague needs your hint, and you can give her advice. Watch the world change, perhaps she will mention you in her report and give you a bonus or bring delicious tea - and these are only visible external bonuses, and if you turn on the analysis more deeply, you can have that huge, but forbidden desire hidden behind the irritation to be able to rely on the knowledge of others, and not to drag everything on your own.

We are not particularly emotionally hurt by things that do not have a reflection in their own psyche, so if someone is really very annoying, then it's not about him, it's about you. You can go from the outside and try to find the desire of a person and his hidden message to you, satisfying that you understand something about yourself. And it is possible from the inside, analyzing what exactly infuriates and how it is related to your needs and capabilities - thus, confidential information is pulled to the top of awareness, and the person ceases to enrage and the number of good words and deeds addressed to him increases by itself .

How to become a kind girl?

Girls are increasingly pumping skills and character, trying not to be a rag and not smearing snot, and generally treat their own inner world and people around them, like guys, and quite rude, strong and tough guys. These qualities are cool for building a career, for sporting achievements, but in any place where it comes to the interaction they suffer a complete fiasco and think how to become kind and sweet as before. Guys still prefer those who look feminine and fragile, and not those who jack their car on the track with a jack.

To become nicer and kinder, start by showing tolerance for the shortcomings of others and patience. A calm solution to problems, a share of self-irony and endless patience, instead of failures to cry because of little things and reproaches due to mistakes made. Willpower to help, because you have to endure various people and their manifestations, leave mate and other strong expressions, as well as insults people. Practice kindness, starting with small things - feed the homeless animals (stop, do not run away - absorb what is happening, perhaps purring or wagging of the tail, notice the tenderness that comes back to you), prepare something tasty and treat your friends (no reason, for fun ). Every day, expanding such cases, over time you will feel a taste for such actions, the main thing is to slow down a bit in the everyday bustle. To have time to notice the luminous eyes, gratitude or the fact that a person could afford to relax a bit, thanks to you.

Train your sensitivity, both to your own state, and to the state of others. Becoming kind and sweet doesn’t mean to be on top of everything, pushing your boundaries and needs to fulfill the whims of others. With a developed sensitivity, you will be able to feel your own fatigue and be able to take care of yourself, you will find an opportunity to compensate for the decline in mood even before it turns into uncontrolled aggression. Likewise, with the feeling of others - the ability to distinguish a person’s need for help from manipulation will help to maintain strength, respect and good relations, and knowing the others will tell you the most accurate options with which you can please a person.

Kindness is always about strength, a wide soul, a mature personality and an adult responsible attitude towards life, about sincere love. Everything. What is beyond the scope of such concepts is manipulation, actions for profit, adaptation, survival behavior.