Psychology and Psychiatry

How to interest a man

How to interest a man? Life is made up of completely different patterns, and a handsome man will not always give his attention to a woman, therefore the ability to interest a man is included in the list of mandatory skills of any woman. Naturally, the interest itself can also be different - with someone you want to have a good time, and then it becomes relevant to quickly attract attention, and with someone you want to lay down the fate and then you should think about how to interest a serious man, and not the first ensure a pleasant weekend.

How does a interested man behave

It is easier to attract the attention of a friend of a man, so the opportunity to establish at least some contact (in the working environment or by asking to deal with the geography of a new place) significantly reduces the distance and expands the field for maneuvers. Moreover, if interest is required sincere and deep, then it is better to carry out his conquest from fairly high positions of the existing communication, which will allow to act with hints and detours. Judge for yourself, because a long-time work colleague can be invited home by asking for help with assembling a bed, and then gratefully drink coffee or feed him dinner, whereas for an unfamiliar man such a suggestion will sound strange or be misinterpreted. But at the same time, a long previous communication erases the novelty of perception, you can’t be a mystery to him and most likely have long been perceived as a friend, and to get out of a folded image like this over the years you will have to spend much more effort than to get acquainted with the same man at a party like that so that everything turns into a novel.

But in any situation there is a way out, just like the pros and cons, you only need to take into account your starting positions and end goals, soberly assess the needs, lifestyle and age of a man, because methods like engaging an adult man are absolutely unsuitable for teenagers and vice versa.

Men in the manifestation of their own feelings and even interest are often secretive, and innate restraint in expressing emotions adds mystery, and so a woman can not understand for a long time whether a given man has an interest in her or he just politely communicates. When it comes to young men, everything is a little simpler - hormones do their work and give out to someone who has fallen in love, there is rarely any question of sympathy, rather wondering why they don’t show it in any way or in the wrong ways.

When a girl thinks about how to interest an adult man or tries to unravel his attitude, then this is comparable to a blind game, since he has already learned to control not only the manifestation of his own emotions, but also the process of their occurrence. But in any case, there are behavioral signs of a man’s interest, which manifest themselves both at the conscious level of behavior and at the level of instinctive reactions beyond the control of the mind.

It is better to discard the signs of attention recognized by society and follow those manifestations that in any case will give out a sincere attitude, this includes facial expressions, pantomimics, changes in physiological indicators (pupil width, breathing rate and heartbeat). Controlling your own gestures, especially micromovements, is a rather complicated task and requires so extreme concentration that if your chosen one did not receive training in the special services, his body is unlikely to be able to hold all the information.

We are arranged in such a way that we open up and get closer to a nice person, therefore, even hiding our own feelings and maintaining a distance, this finds a manifestation in the turn of the body in the direction of a pretty girl, it is possible that one leg will be put in your direction - these are signs of a stopped step towards , desires to approach, which would have been fulfilled under other conditions or moods. Also observe the moments at which the man begins to monitor his appearance (not the straightened shirts and hair straightening, but the desire to appear higher, to straighten his shoulders, to level his posture), if such actions occur when you appear, then it is you who unconsciously wants to impress .

But there are socially determined moments in the form of shaking off dust particles, pulling out of a jacket, sorting out something in your hands - this is rather a sign of anxiety and anxiety, they can be taken as sympathy only if other reasons are excluded (i.e. arrived with a check, and the man goes through the pencils on the table, then, most likely, there are problems with reporting than the interest in you as a woman). An interested man, one way or another, will be close to you, it may look quite reasonable and harmless, he may not even look at you as he passes by, but the more often such casual meetings become, the higher his level of interest in you.

In addition to behavioral manifestations, watch the man's facial expressions. An interested man will smile openly and sincerely, without a forced tight smile. Perhaps when dealing with personal topics it is with you that he will blush, which gives an indifference to the interlocutor. Watch the other person’s eyebrows; if they are raised, this is a sign of interest in the person you are talking to or talking to. Eliminate important serious topics in order to understand whether you are interesting (talking with a colleague about raising it, you will in any case get an interested reaction, but if it persists when discussing donuts in the cafeteria, then this indicates sympathy for the interlocutor, and not donuts ). If everything that happens does not help you to stop at one option, then look him in the eye: the interested man holds his gaze on the pretty girl, and the width of the pupils can understand the nature of this interest: if they are expanded, then you are sympathetic and all his attention is focused on if you are narrowed down, but the look remains long, then you are assessed, subjecting to critical analysis, and the sensual sphere is not yet involved.

In order not to fantasize too much, looking for confirmation of one of the signs of interest, you should always keep a cold mind, remembering that these signs are indirect clues, manifestations of the subconscious mind, which consist of many factors, so before you diagnose interest in your own person, you should recheck all the data in different conditions and evaluate the overall picture, rather than its individual factors, ignoring the general meaning.

A man who is interested in a woman is usually active - he comes in, writes and calls, he offers various options for hanging out together and develops relations in the direction of rapprochement. If you communicate exclusively with your filing for a month, the man constantly disappears and does not seek to shorten the distance, then most likely his interest was invented by you yourself, and he answers you out of politeness or a code of etiquette. To come up with excuses about employment and restraint, especially the nature and rules of the manifestation of feelings - this means more and more to drive yourself into the sphere of illusions, it is better to admit that at the moment you are not interested in this man and wonder how you can correct the situation.

How to behave to interest a man

If you need any man, then there is no reason to think about the reasons for his interest, you just have to twist your head better, and you will definitely notice at least one man’s glance, someone who is only looking for female attention (again, any). If the question is how to interest a serious man, then you should start as usual with yourself. There are three fundamentals without which everything will come to naught: appearance (which would not speak about the value of the soul, but it is the outer shell that attracts attention to it), the mind (the opinion that men are only interested in appearance is wrong and if you can only connect incomprehensible sounds with a few words, then say goodbye in a minute), faith in yourself (decent self-esteem automatically corrects your behavior, and men are drawn to those who are confident and believe that they are worthy of attention, leaving alone the unsure asking for interest).

Submit the first signs of your interest, than to open the way for a man to take action, you can use the look. Often, blinking, winking and looking at certain angles looks convincingly at the cinema, and in life it is captivated by an open, long, interested look directly in the eyes, without hesitation and transfer to another object. Having learned to smile and invite to a conversation with a look, you will be able to interest both a long-time familiar man and a stranger.

A man must initially feel that he will be able to win the attention of this woman, otherwise he will not make attempts, assessing her as inappropriate or inappropriate - it’s scary to approach not only a woman with a material or professional status exceeding the male one in advance, but also those who does not show minimal approval. Smile with a sincere open smile, look into your eyes and you will show that you are interested in the advances of this man.

If you communicate, try to listen more about it - it will create an aura of mystery around you (and all men will attract secrets) and will enable the man to show himself (some will be boasting, but some are true, and you can direct the conversation to your mainstream) ). More communication creates more interest and depth of intimacy. Compliments in communicating with a man are important, but you should not do everything sugary sweet - a woman in love and conquered is not of interest, so you can safely criticize or engage in controversy, such emotions warm up interest (and many relationships started precisely with a showdown).

To play on negative feelings you need to be able to - this is always a risk, because a man can stop communicating with the slightest deviation to the side, but if you put everything right, it will be a sure and quick win. This is true for your conversations and his jealousy. It is the hunter's instinct that makes a man act, and heightened attention from other men makes you think about the possible loss and invalidity of you (after all, others cannot be mistaken and something in you has attracted them).

Pay attention to the state of affairs of a man, if he is in debt, and the project burns in time, then he is clearly not up to you, but obsessive attention can cause a serious quarrel - it is better to remain in the shadows during such periods, and be sure to use moments of rest and carelessness triumph and victory that you want to share with someone. It is important for women to support in difficult situations, men prefer that no one knew about this, but they are trying to share their victories.

How to interest a man in conversation

Attracting a man with his appearance and interest in his life, asking for help and expressing his interest directly, many forget that these things are one-time, and they quickly get used to external factors, but there is always something that can keep people together for a long time. This is an interesting conversation. In order for a man’s interest to hold after the first impression made, it’s worthwhile to work with his own speech and completely eliminate mats and surzhik, mistakes in pronunciation and places where words are used. Developing the ability to communicate, one should follow not only the correct formulation of one's own thoughts (with beautiful comparisons, witty comments, references to original sources), but also select in advance a few topics that will be interesting to the interlocutor.

It’s pointless to rehearse a conversation, real people with sincere reactions will still lead him into a spontaneously arising topic or mood, while having genuine interest in your interlocutor helps to remain in the active field. The woman who constantly talks about herself admires the first couple of minutes, then the man has a question of finding him nearby, so any questions about him, his preferences and life will be relevant. Remove the standard questions about work and hobbies (they create the feeling of an interview), ask what you are really interested in (“why did you choose such a strange tie to this blue jacket?” Will not only demonstrate your sincerity and observation, but can give a unique story, which this man never told anyone). And when you talk about yourself, try not to whine (for this there is a psychotherapist's office, and not a meeting table), or immediately warn you that at the moment you are completely stuck together and will complain (this is how a man will feel needed and your indifference to him, moreover he will become more stable and be able to cheer).

Many people think that it is inappropriate to discuss topics of personal life, but the effect is the opposite - people quickly come closer and open up to each other, especially since sooner or later you would know all the information. But this is not a reason to stay on a dramatic note all the time, the more lightness and laughter in your communication, the better. But each time, in choosing a topic, that the volume of your own voice, be guided by the reaction of a man, because it is in accordance with the key to interest.

How to interest a man by correspondence

Considering that if you started chatting and chatting, you became not interested in a man, perhaps he just spends time in traffic or on a boring meeting, and it’s more fun to message than to scroll through the social network. The rules of winning interest by correspondence are about the same as in life: be friendly, not rude, communicate culturally and on interesting topics. But there are features characteristic only for correspondence. This includes the use of smiles and stickers - their presence helps to convey emotions, but some are so enthusiastic that the message consists entirely of pictures or emoticons stand through the word - and so, such messages are difficult for men to read, both technically for reading and for understanding emotional states (remember, however, that the emotional sphere is a female prerogative and a combination of crying, laughing and eating cake emoticons, leave for a friend, she will understand).

At the beginning of the correspondence, it is worthwhile to leave free space and not to make the gadget of a nice man constantly notify about new messages, but excessive coldness can play a bad role, because in life he can see your warm eyes or you can accidentally touch, and in virtual communication silence can be perceived as a lack of interest and, accordingly, the man will stop bothering you in return. Show interest, ask questions, and tell about yourself only when you see mutual interest, to begin communication with the description of your own day, when you did not ask about it - the road to nowhere. Just as with personal communication, you should follow the words used, but in this case, you do not have to worry about pronunciation, but you need to work on literacy (or at least turn on the autocheck).

Correspondence in the modern world provides an opportunity to demonstrate more facets of your personality, which is what you should do using photo attachment and adding music. If the banal question "what are you doing?", You send him a photo of where you are sitting in the park, and your book or outline gets into the frame, then it will interest much more than a dry "nothing", will give the opportunity to continue the meaningful dialogue. The more different areas you can discuss together in the chat mode, the more the man will be interested in communicating with you.