Psychology and Psychiatry

How to communicate with men

How to communicate with men? Understanding how to communicate with the strong half is gained with experience, as well as wisdom of life, is a skill that requires separate development. It is impossible to understand a man completely initially on the basis of differences in psychological specifics, methods of realization, existing values ​​and other things. Indeed, the differences between the sexes are large and this is manifested even in communication and relationships.

Knowledge of this kind can be useful in completely different situations, when the feeling of novelty disappears and relationships become cool, when there is an interest in a particular man, when you need to convey information or understand what he wants from you. All aspects of communication from intimate to business, as well as from personal to virtual include the ability to interact and take into account the psychology of men. Naturally, each person needs an individual, unique approach, but they also highlight general rules that help build communication in a constructive way of understanding and respect initially. These are the basic principles that should be tried to achieve, because if a man has no respect for a woman as an interlocutor and he does not take into account her opinions, then other attempts to form a dialogue will be useless.

How to communicate with men? Start with the courage to be yourself. When communicating this is not enough for everyone, but especially for women, the desire to like and adjust themselves to the needs of others who have increased. State the facts directly, without long introductions and embellishments, speak your personal opinion, but do not confirm the words of the man - and you will begin to listen to at least from the fact that you are different from the mass society, watering everyone with marshmallow syrup in the desire to like. Men appreciate simplicity and do not accept manipulations, respectively, if the image of you is simple and honest, then the lion’s share of successful communication will be made.

How to communicate with men

The psychology of communicating with a man should develop in you not the ability to pretend and manipulate, but the ability to cooperate and communicate your thoughts. Learn prudence to highlight the main thing and focus on this, and not go aside and tie in the details. The ability to listen and hear the interlocutor will also be very useful to you. That is, to learn how to communicate with men, you do not have to make extra efforts and drastically change your way of interacting. To do this, it is necessary to familiarize only with some peculiarities of perception, as well as to work out the skills of successful communication, which will be useful in dealing with women, and with children and old people, with all people, no matter what criteria you choose.

The psychology of communicating with a man is based on simplicity, so the main rule of being heard and understood correctly is the directness of your words. Naturally, it should be correct and relate exclusively to your needs and your opinion when asked about it. Hurtful language is not the necessary extreme, so one should not in a direct and cruel form indicate to a man his shortcomings, often putting pressure on weak points. Such behavior can scare anyone away. Directness in a conversation with a man comes down to your ability to designate the main thing in your message, and it is with this that you should start a conversation. If another woman listens to you for ten minutes, waiting for the outcome and the main idea, then the man actively perceives the information in the first half minute of your monologue and considers this information as the main one. If you didn’t start directly and immediately with the topic or topic you are interested in, then bringing it to you in time, you have already lost your male attention and you have to make extra efforts to attract it or accept it.

Leave the desire to play a role and fit into the image of a woman who will like this man. Plan a failure because you can not know until the end, what image he likes, and any game will open over time, since no one can pretend forever. Of course, your self-esteem and acceptance mechanisms are involved here, so before you train on others, restore an adequate self-perception and, despite the presence of flaws (everyone has), be yourself, perhaps for those features that you do not recognize and eliminate a man will love you.

Build communication in such a way that a man does not feel shame - a feeling that causes other people to avoid contact with the person who caused it. It is better to find moments when a man deserves praise and compliments, and you should not wait for heroic deeds for this. The stereotype about male power and severity and unacceptability of all sentimentality and tenderness is too stable, but it ultimately plunges them into a world where there is no gratitude and feelings for them. Support and approval is necessary even for the strongest, they are able to support a person and give inspiration and strength, and gratitude for such a sense of self will not make you wait long.

Avoid quarrels and disputes, because for men it is not a way to clarify relationships and get to know another better, but a real confrontation, requiring the mobilization of all forces and actualizing the fear of defeat. If you see that he is wrong, then it is better to keep silent than to continue to prove your point - so you will save not only a lot of nerves, but you will not move from the role of a woman to the role of an opponent. So that he does not take your arguments as aggression - do not follow the text, but the intonation. In principle, in conversation with a man, for the most part, keep track of what volume and tonality you say the words, because an elevated tone (even if you want to express your concern, confusion, the need for his participation) in such a way evokes either a defense or a confrontation. In any of these manifestations, you lose constructive dialogue. In addition to controlling intonation, allow pauses to appear in the dialogue - when a man is silent, this is not a signal that he has finished thinking, stopped communicating with you or ignores it, most often it is a process of his internal reasoning. Women tend to think out loud, this is how they find a way out - just by calling and telling a friend the situation, a decision comes in the process of pronouncing. Men think without words, so if your question is more difficult to choose between tea and coffee, leave points for decision-making.

A separate point clarification deserve questions. A large number of them from the female side make a man to strain and move away from communication in all sorts of ways. Usually women think that this is a sign of secrecy and deception and climb with even greater perseverance. If you see that a man is moving away from communication, it is better to stop asking any questions for a while, to give him freedom and to show less activity by pulling him into a frank conversation. When he is ready and the time comes, he will tell everything himself. Typically, men rarely use the feminine method of understatement, and mean only what they wanted to say. If a man says that cookies are not tasty, he means only the taste of cookies, and not that you do not like him, if you ask him to feed him, then this does not reproach you, but hunger.

How to communicate with any man

To build a conversation with absolutely any man you need to choose the right time for this communication. Choosing the evening time after work, remember that you are communicating with a tired and exhausted person who most likely has a share of stress from daytime events, and possibly trouble. If you are in such a state of talking about something important or discussing unpleasant moments, then you risk getting an aggressive reaction or avoiding a conversation. The discussion of the day and support may be acceptable themes in the evening, leave it harder for a more resource state.

If you see that a man is tense and upset about something, then you do not have to jump around him, trying to find out about the troubles. Such participation will be appreciated by your girlfriend, and for a man the best thing you can do is to provide a comfortable and relaxed atmosphere so that at least next to you nothing irritates his nervous system. It is not typical for men to share problems, they are rather trying to find a way out, and this requires silence and the opportunity to think. If he needs your support or advice, he will tell about everything and ask. Issues that plunge into a stupor relate to any topic of feelings, as it is less free for men than for women. Therefore, only with the purpose of turning it off for a few minutes from reality, one can ask "what do you feel now?", If you want to learn something from this area, then it is better to appeal to thoughts and conclusions - there will be more sense and you will get at least some that answer.

In the dialogues, keep in mind conciseness, both from your side and with his. If you ask a question that can be answered in one word, then you will receive exactly this answer. The same men expect from you. Many details and prehistory are confusing, and they lose the meaning of your story, and they themselves are more inclined to manifest themselves in actions than words, therefore they are laconic. The words of a man usually refer only to this moment, so it’s not worth relying on their meaning, even the men themselves say that actions are more truthful. That is, if you heard that he loves you, then yes, it was at that moment that he loved you, but if you haven’t been seeing this for a month, and all the steps towards you are from you, then draw conclusions on the actions without throwing question sms of a young man.

If you need something, ask directly and frankly. Men do not like the commanding tone and manipulation of guilt - some are angry. Some are offended, but no one is running to fulfill your needs. The request, with the recognition of his skills in this area, inspires the man himself and makes you do as much and quickly for you as you wish. In addition, remember that men value themselves and those around them through achievements and deeds, so by giving them the opportunity to do something, you allow them to realize their own feelings.

Avoid pressure, because the strength of a woman is in her softness and ability to adapt, and when you put pressure on a man, you argue with him to the victorious, you become the same man in his perception and he begins to compete with you. Let him have the impression that he makes all the decisions, and you support him, and this can be achieved not only by direct confrontation, but by gradually explaining his vision of the situation, by periodically pointing to examples without pressure. This may take longer, but you will definitely not be enemies.

How to communicate with a man on the Internet

Communication in the network greatly simplifies many psychological difficulties in communication - you can adjust your social profile, somehow, if there are complexes, there is no need for eye contact, which confuses many, and the text can always be edited before sending, which minimizes the number of regrets about an accidentally dropped phrase. Naturally, there are also disadvantages, because not only you, but also the person at the other end of the chat can provide not their data, prove to be a fraud or be a pleasant conversationalist only on the network actively using Wikipedia and Google. This applies to virtual dating, while many of the real meetings continue in the network, because it is convenient.

In any case, to communicate on the Internet it is necessary to maintain a rich conversation, not only intellectually, but also emotionally. Topics that include the interests of men are great, but be careful if this topic does not arouse your interest, because this is felt even through printed text and can offend the other person. It is better to demonstrate your interest by asking questions, but do not be intrusive in an effort to force events. No matter how brave a man in correspondence is, steps towards the development of relationships (whether it is an exchange of photographs or the translation of communication into reality) must come from him.

Answer the man's questions with a few sentences, it's useless to lay out the full biography. If he is delicate and does not ask questions, then tell yourself about your life or hobbies yourself, you can share the events in the city and funny links. Adjust the frequency of communication and end the dialogue even before you bored the other person. The first signs can be noticed by monosyllabic answers and frequent pauses between messages. At the end of the dialogue do not forget about the farewell, and not just go out of the network - wishes of a good evening and good night are quite appropriate, you can even with the addition of music or pictures. Leave the person feeling a pleasant completion, then the next communication will be happy.

In general, it is better to communicate a little less, but with a high level of interest than every day, but painfully looking for topics to maintain a dialogue. And if you feel that interest is becoming more than just a periodic correspondence, then do not delay with the development of virtualization, so as not to fantasize yourself about a person too much.