Tactfulness is a property of a subject to adhere to a certain measure in conversation, in committing acts, as well as the ability to assess the situation in advance and find an effective way to resolve conflicts without causing moral damage. A person who is able to act in accordance with the established standard of etiquette regardless of the situation is called tactful. Tact is the secret of individual success in all areas of life. In particular, one should not forget that tact, as part of an individual’s character, is formed on the basis of natural qualities, in the process of hard work on oneself, in the period of upbringing and training.
The meaning of the word tact with the Latin language is touch or touch. It follows from this that tactfulness makes it possible, as if to "touch", to understand the situation, behavior, feelings, the subject of interaction. Those who have a sense of proportion, who can understand the needs, desires and experiences of the interlocutor, will always be a welcome person in society.
What is tact
Tactfulness allows the person to behave culturally among people, to take into account all the specifics of the situation, which is indicated by a kind of aesthetics. Tactfulness is the ability to talk about an error if necessary, to make remarks in such a way so as not to humiliate the dignity of a person, not to hurt his feelings, to spare his pride, and in spite of everything, not exaggerating his own advantages.
A tactful person can understand what statements can make the wrong impression or offend an opponent. When it is not necessary to speak sarcastically, under what conditions not to mention errors or non-standard appearance. Such an individual, on the contrary, will be able to pick up good words to praise or encourage the other person. He will find a way to suspend the conversation in time, which may contribute to the beginning of the development of the conflict, or suspend others who do not speak correctly in his direction.
To have a similar quality, it is not enough to follow generally accepted rules and norms of behavior. The main thing is the meaning of the word tact is the possession of a sense of proportion, the ability to find the line beyond which you should not go. At the same time be unobtrusive, do not offer your help or, not advise, to a person who does not need.
Tactfulness allows an individual who does not seek to change his point of view to redirect the conversation in the opposite direction, thus avoiding the emergence of a dispute or misunderstanding.
In order to master the true skills of being a tactful person, one should always self-improve. A person should not forget that there are people around who can serve as an example, motivate us to form and expand our horizons. A person is a multifaceted person; by observing her behavior, one can learn to predict actions, emotional state, learn a lot of new things about others, and about oneself. The study of the psychology of personality helps to find the true path to the development of such an important quality. A person endowed with a sense of tact is able to feel himself in the role of another, which gives him the opportunity to more subtly understand the actions and feelings of others, to understand their mental state.
Watching the daily actions of people, it makes sense to pay attention that the fulfillment of the norms of etiquette by the subject does not necessarily indicate the presence of a tactful personality in him. A person who hides in his heart anger, arrogance, not respect, resentment, can only outwardly resemble a tactful person, but his actions will be accompanied by fake and hypocrisy. The ability to understand the interlocutor, not to impose his opinion on him, to control the emotional development of the situation, the right approach to exposing people who are capable of blindly hiding behind a screen of etiquette.
Tactfulness in communication
Tactfulness can be called a benevolent approach to people, as a rule, this principle of behavior is the basis of etiquette. If a person is not obsessed with his own importance and well-being, but thinks about the feelings and experiences of others, then he automatically receives the status of a tactful person. Tactfulness is based on the special qualities of the individual’s character, which each person must form throughout his life. Namely, the manifestation of such qualities contributes to comfortable communication in all life situations.
A fundamental manifestation of tact in communication, is the ability to not just listen to the interlocutor, and most importantly feel that he seeks to communicate, not to interrupt, to listen to the end. Even if the point of view of the opponent is not appropriate or may be touchy, do not forget about tactfulness when responding to his statements. The use of mutual respect and understanding in no way other than the fundamental components of tactful communication. Also, the characteristic signs of similar communication is the ability of a person to take into account the situation in which the events unfold: the discrepancy in the age of opponents, their social status, gender, and the presence of surrounding listeners. In spite of everything, a tactful person never shows his interlocutor his dislike, but on the contrary tries in every way to understand his beliefs, to feel his condition.
Individuals with a high degree of tactfulness, as a rule, adapt to any interaction conditions, always behave, naturally, relaxed and at ease, they do not act out this role, do not behave arrogantly and familiarly. The ability to communicate in this way helps a person in various ways to avoid intractable situations, and most importantly not to humiliate the dignity of another person.
A person who has a sense of tact often has the ability to attract everyone around him, such people are often called deeply educated and educated. And this promotes the personality to always be desired in society, it will be appreciated in various companies, both among friends and in the work team. An individual with a pronounced tactful behavior will have a reputation as a reliable person, because it is not a secret that such individuals will never say too much, find a way out of an awkward situation and will be able to stop an undesired conversation in time.
Tactfulness is not only an innate personality trait, it can also be learned. In order to effectively develop the qualities of a tactful person, one should learn how to relate to those around, thus, just as much as we would like them to relate to us. You should get used to “putting on” your own jokes, rash behavior, bright emotions. This will help the person realize that with a huge amount of differences, all people are similar. And from this it follows: everything that causes discomfort and hostility among ourselves cannot possibly appeal to another. Tactfulness needs to be shaped from childhood, to teach a child that such a setting for life will help him to distinguish between the needs and emotions of the people around him, to easily find friends, to support any conversation, to achieve success in learning and professional activities.
Examples of tact, that is, its manifestations, it is very easy to notice in all life situations. For example, a teacher or teacher who attentively and respectfully treats each student, and does not focus his attention on their shortcomings, behaves in relation to them - tactfully. Or parents who do not allow themselves or others to express themselves indecently in the presence of a child, or to punish him for misconduct in front of the audience. Colleagues, having noticed an oversight in your report, will not publicly mention this, but will tell about it personally, this is also an example of tactful behavior.
A tactful person, who will not impose his own opinion, brag about or elevate himself above others, does not ask intimate-personal questions that they can immerse the interlocutor in an uncomfortable position. As a rule, tactful people will not begin to sort things out in the open, everything that happens in their personal lives, prefer not to be put on display for all to see, which subsequently helps to preserve family ties, comfort and mutual understanding in family life.
So, it should be noted that the natural intuition of a person, his upbringing, a vast amount of knowledge and skills, and most importantly, a respectful approach to people - is the basis of such personality quality as tact. A person who is capable of tact, always bases his opinion on the subtle sensation of the sensory state and the experiences of the person with whom he interacts. Examples of tactful behavior can be cited countless times. Their bright display can be seen not only in daily life, but also in well-known literary works, reading which we learn to be tactful.
Perhaps tact is not the most important property of the individual, because there are other qualities, such as loyalty, love, empathy. However, it should be emphasized that without tact, the risk of harming another person is much higher than with a reasonable possession of this quality. For example, a person who was brought up since childhood according to the rule “always help your neighbor” can cause irreparable harm with his help, just because he has taken into account the wishes and preferences of his opponent. The ability to understand and take into account the wishes of those who are close by, makes it possible to help them, without going beyond the limits of what is permitted. At the same time, it allows one to push freely to find the strength in oneself and solve the problems on one’s own, as they wish.
A person who seeks tactful behavior has several advantages:
- constantly working on himself;
- reduces the likelihood of rudeness and self-respect;
- does not raise itself above others;
- learns to be attentive to others, regardless of age, gender or status;
- learns not to notice mistakes, but rather to stimulate the development of human virtues;
- strive to know the multifaceted world, and yourself.