Office romance at work involves the relationship of colleagues, beyond the scope of business and partnership in the sphere of intimate interaction. The phenomenon of people arranging personal life through work has become quite common, since most of the time in modern society is spent at work, other people are most deeply recognized there. The atmosphere of solving production and creative tasks makes people show their qualities that a person simply cannot manifest in a different type of communication. These include quick resolution of complex issues, mutual assistance, psychological support, aggression and anger - everything is often hidden in the romantic period of the beginning of a relationship. In addition, the very period of psychological convergence is shortened, because people have already been in many close contacts, possibly experienced stresses and rush jobs, which also brings together.
There are several types of office romance at work, most of which are not encouraging with their prospects and psychological well-being. So a love affair with a married man gives a certain amount of support at work and brings a lot of drive into intimate life, but if some of the participants want to take them to a more serious or official level, then difficulties and resistance from the other side begin to arise.
The reputation of both participants is seriously endangered, since the novel at work, as if it were not concealed, will be the subject of discussion by colleagues, and the public condemns such ties.
A love affair with the boss seems to be an attractive option until the first disagreements - additional bonuses and a privileged position are possible here, but with the disagreements that have begun, more often than not, everything is decided by dismissal.
The novel at work with a single colleague - this is the best option of all possible combinations for the development of love relationships, which later can really turn into a family. Many people are so immersed in their professional activities that they have nowhere else to meet or their interests are so far from others that only a person in the subject can support both hobbies and humor and understand problems.
Pluses of love relationships
Of course, the novel at work has quite a few advantages, even despite the censure, threats and condemnations of those who adhere to strict policies and moral standards. Particularly vividly, these moments can be experienced by free people, since in the foreground stands the constant proximity of the partner and the possibility of close contact. Such relationships exclude moments of unjustified jealousy towards colleagues and forced delays after the allotted time, because if people are not even together, they always know the objective reason for this behavior.
Constantly being together allows you to get to know your partner more deeply, to see his personal manifestations in a wide variety of life situations. In relation to themselves, positive emotions of love always give impetus to development. And if in other circumstances a new novel only interferes with work, makes a person more immersed in correspondence and soar in dreams of an early meeting, then the novel at work can even serve as a career growth. Personally, love relationships at work stimulate continuous improvement, self-development. This concerns both professional qualities (in order to prove that not only through feelings you are trying to achieve everything), but also to maintain appearance (if there is no one at work, you can come as you like, if there is a loved one there, then immediately rises the desire to take care of yourself and look decent).
For the development of love relationships, having common themes, although working, is a very good development factor. There are no awkward pauses, there is no lack of understanding of fatigue. For people working in different fields, dialogues about the past day can be reduced to a couple of phrases, while employees of one organization will always have something to discuss. For the psychological climate of a small team, the presence of a pair is also a stabilizing factor, the level of benevolence increases.
Cons of love relationships
Having considered the positive aspects of the novel at work, one should definitely mention its negative aspects, due to which many people warn against such ties and reprimand ever to have love relationships with co-workers. Here comes to the fore the widespread publicity office romance, as if the couple did not try to hide it. The fact of staff awareness is usually followed by gossip, condemnation, reduction of the merits of someone who is lower in rank. The way out is to minimize people's awareness of what is happening between the couple, but slander and ridicule are almost inevitable, especially when it comes to a romance with the boss.
Relations with colleagues can deteriorate for many reasons. Someone has his own unsettled personal life and it is unbearable for a person to see happy couples, and here, in an unexpected place for this, they step on a sore spot. Workaholics can be annoyed by the constant cooing and distraction of a couple on other topics. If among the collective there are those who felt sympathy for someone from the participants of the love affair, but forbade such relations to themselves, then the level of anger and envy can even go to the level of actions.
In personal relationships, satiety can come, because absolutely all the time people spend together. If you do not complement work topics with other pastimes, get-togethers with friends outside of work, then soon the topics can exhaust themselves, rely on initial engagement for a short time, then you need to work on developing relationships. Without preventive measures, the line between work and intimate relationships may blur so much that family scandals will take place at work, and people in bed will discuss the strategy of a new business plan.
A moment of mistrust regarding the sincerity of feelings can arise in an unequal official position. So, the chief may doubt that it is he who is sympathetic, and not the privileges granted to the beloved. At the same time, a person of the lowest rank will feel a lack of attention, because the decisions of working moments in leadership positions will still be a priority.
The difficult moment is the ending of a love, service romance, because, in addition to emotional experiences, a grave condition arises with regard to further interaction. Not all former lovers greet when confronted in a store, and the level of stress from forced communication on business matters can be critical.
How to behave with a married man
A love affair with a married man always brings negative feelings along with bright emotions of the same depth, and if everything happens in one team, then the level of dispersal of the emotional swing becomes critically high. Advice to those who assess their mental impossibility to cope with this kind of experience - to reject all offers in time and not to react to signs of attention. You can pretend to be a fool, not understanding hints or directly declare the inadmissibility of such. It is more difficult for those who have already agreed to communicate with a married man for reasons of inability to resist or for the purpose of temporarily being in such non-binding relationships.
It is important to realize that the official wife will always be in the first place, mistresses are brought in not to make them the meaning of life, but to find a temporary outlet. A rather small percentage of men are ready to exchange already established relationships and an established life for a romantic, albeit uncertainty. Based on this position, attempts to somehow bind a married man to themselves will be unsuccessful, and possibly lead to a rupture. Especially it concerns the tactics of accidental discovery of one’s own existence, when a woman intentionally leaves traces on the clothes or skin of her partner, gives intimate gifts or accessories, demanding that the man wear them. Most likely, at first he will try to reach an agreement, then he will become angry and eventually dissolve the relationship.
Do not confuse your role - this man you have secretly and temporarily. No need to acquaint him with relatives, call on the soup and iron shirts. All that is required for your mutual happiness is to maintain the lightness and beauty of the relationship, and this requires romantic meetings, delicious light dinners and a good mood. No attempt to get deep into the soul, and even more so in family relationships will not be crowned with success.
Perform official duties, as before, do not ask him for help or intercession. Of course, a man will not be able to refuse you, because he obviously has certain feelings, but the more such moments there are, the higher the likelihood that the public will know and the further the reputation of both will end.
How to finish a relationship
Ending a novel at work is burdened by the constant presence of a former partner in your life. At best, you will have to fight only with your own experiences, at worst you will have to resist his attacks or revenge, as well as align relations with the whole team. Such difficulties scare dismissal, as the only way out of the situation, and as a result, people are forced to maintain obsolete or tedious relationships, to the detriment of their time and psychological comfort.
In order to minimize the consequences of ending a love affair at work, make an advance agreement with a partner about maintaining a neutral attitude and adhering to business etiquette. Everything that happens between two people should not affect the results of activities, which is why it is important to maintain a business style of communication. It is especially important to strictly adhere to the chosen line of conduct when the partner does not maintain the indicated framework. At first, it can be hard for both, because the habit is stronger - you can not retreat and give concessions to yourself or your former partner.
After the break of love relationships gossip will begin to fly for information. Do not discuss anything, do not give any personal information. Attempts to take revenge on the former partner in the working moments, telling about him any obscenities, in the end will ruin your reputation. Even if a lot of time has passed, it may seem that everything has subsided, but your loud stories about the new novel can provoke unexpected reactions.
Reduce the amount of communication, especially informal - choose a company for a coffee break and a smoke so as to not accidentally collide. If the corporate party is nearing, it is better to find a respectful excuse and not to go to it, if this is not possible, then eliminate the use of alcohol so as not to provoke emotional outbursts.
Gradually, relations should level off, if this does not happen, then set up a meeting and frankly discuss with your former partner all the problems, possible options for your peaceful existence side by side, or look for ways where you will no longer overlap.