Vanity is a property of human nature, expressed in an excessive desire to make a good impression, and in the eyes of others, and in their own perception. Vain uses all methods, if his real image does not reach, then it can well use lies, exaggerations, statements, degrading others in order to demonstrate their superiority.
The search for fame and universal recognition, along with admiration, is expressed so vividly that a person takes flattery for truth and appreciates surrounding sycophants who provide the necessary level of honor and admiration for non-existent virtues. The manifestation of vanity features is emptiness and groundlessness, that is, vain, unconfirmed by reality glory.
The meaning of the word vanity is synonymous with kitsch, pride, arrogance, as well as the whole complex of manifestations, referred to as star fever. This is arrogance, accompanied by passion and dependence on this experience. A person who is in need of constant external glorification very soon, as an addict, begins to need all in large doses. And now, if earlier flattery was enough only at work, now it is necessary in personal relationships, where it was enough to praise once a week, there is a psychological need for more frequent incentives, even hourly ones.
There is no initial conditionality of this manifestation among people, as well as patterns among ages, nationalities and religions. Vanity has only psychological prerequisites and often arises where there is no humility or inadequate self-esteem.
To determine vanity, it is dangerous to look at the external manifestations of a person, because the veiled benefits can be very high. So, a person can consciously take the blame for everything that happens, lead an overly modest lifestyle and be vain. He is just waiting for comments from others, appreciating his solitary life and elevating his modesty. So, we come to the conclusion that vanity can manifest itself in any and in various situations, and not only in relation to achievements and wealth, because some boast about how they have lost everything.
What it is
Many directions consider that such vanity and, despite the difference in approaches of religion and psychology, social and philosophical sciences, the perception of this quality in the section of shortcomings remains unified. Moreover, from many personality traits that are undesirable only to one person, vanity harms both the person and the environment. In many ways, a conceited person is not even aware of his problems, since the mechanisms that trigger such an attitude toward the world are more subconscious. As a result, significant personal ties can collapse, career development and other social aspects of life stall, while the individual herself, losing her contribution, is at a loss, not knowing what to do.
Empty vanity implies undeserved praise, regardless of the initial level. So the artist, whose exhibition once thundered to the whole world, will expect the same worship of all his works, even if there is no objective moment of creativity in them. But a person whose conceit is bloated can expect applause and admiration from any of his steps, even in professional activities where he does not have minimal knowledge.
Vanity functions through an increase in other shortcomings, for example, when a person does not see the desired response from others, he can begin to use boasting and lies, and in order to provide himself with a constant supply of positive emotions he surrounds himself with liars and flatterers. Such a way of being in the end turns out to be quite frustrating, because flatterers usually look for their own benefit and leave at an unfavorable opportunity, and their own lies and boasting can destroy the last sincere connections.
In fact, it may seem that vanity drives a person towards development and achievement, because these people do not forgive themselves for failures and want to show good results in any field. This is a claim to ideality, where ambitions are so high that they are impossible to achieve without being a fairy-tale character or deity. High-ranking posts, the ability to dance, the level of energy and the ability in molecular chemistry - all this must be at a height (or at least those around you must say so). So it turns out that as an engine of the beginning of new achievements and aspirations, vanity is quite suitable, only it does not stop after that, changing a person’s whole life.
Signs of Vanity
In order not to confuse vanity with the requirement of well-deserved remuneration, as well as with modesty or vice versa by boasting, it is important to note the main features of such a thin and multidimensional concept. The first is the constant desire for praise and adulation, and it does not matter in a sincere or deceitful form. At times, such people may themselves begin to praise the other, exaggerating his merits in order to receive praise.
Vanity is always striving for outward activity, showing off their own affairs. Such people prefer to be always in sight, if this is a company of friends, then they take a leading role, and if they work, they choose to be associated with social publicity. Even carrying out activities necessary for themselves (donations, visits to temples, volunteer movement), guided by vanity, these people create a whole PR campaign, even from visiting a monastery and the sacrament.
Thirst for attention is manifested at once on several levels - appearance, behavior and spirituality. About active activities, everything is clear in determining its publicity. Clothing, as well as the overall style of its appearance is created taking into account the attraction of attention, which is achieved through clothing, makeup, hair, tattoos and scarring, as well as many other components. Execution may be different. In the cheap and tasteless version it will be bright colors, crazy cut and inappropriate (but in large quantities) accessories. Those who have the taste and material means usually use branded items, collectible models and the style developed by world-famous designers.
The spiritual aspect is manifested in the propensity to lecture, the absence of humility and the recognition of each person’s own path. To impose one’s own motives, beliefs and preferences, it’s not necessary for a conceited person to be an expert in the field or to at least somehow navigate - a vague feeling is enough, what to do and how he himself would like. At the same time, people tend to receive as many awards and certificates, awards and letters of commendation as they can - any material evidence of their achievements, using which one can demonstrate to others one’s high level and originality.
But mentally these people are weak - all external titles serve as armor from insults and offenses. The most terrible thing in their life is to lose the reputation of others, and therefore, life is not built on the basis of their own needs and motivations, but only focusing on external factors.
The perception of criticism in one’s own address is rather difficult, and even if it has a constructive direction, the vanity always chooses the sweetened flattery and remains in illusion instead of thinking about his own mistakes. Such people are focused more on words and praise than on activity. That is, they can spend a couple of hours to convince a group of professionals that they should be entrusted with a project, because no one can do better and there is no similar level of specialists, but not to start implementation. The discrepancy between words and deeds is the main problem, annoying the closest people and not being noticed by the conceited person himself.
How to get rid of vanity
Understanding that vanity works against the individual and imaginary contentment, felt for the first time minutes in the long run, leads to the collapse of many intrapersonal and social important things. To reduce the level of their vain manifestations, it is necessary to rely on willpower and respond to people only when they ask, and in the context of the question. That is, not to express an opinion that was not asked, not to learn to live and not to provide unnecessary information, especially advertising the person himself. In principle, it is necessary to reduce the number of words and focus on activities - to set new practical goals, to achieve achievements. In the real world, you can get dust in your eyes only once, and then a person is judged by his deeds and accomplishments; therefore, you need to earn your need for fame and honor by works, and not by dubious self-promotion.
It is necessary to refuse any evaluative judgments concerning people and the person. In contact with others, the absence of such comments will save from exaltation due to the humiliation of others or from false praises in order to hear good in your address. More carefully, one should choose words regarding oneself, and it is better to refuse them altogether and let people draw conclusions on their own. What difference does it make if you never substitute or are a guru of mathematics - until society sees your reliability and abilities, words remain meaningless.
In order not to fall into the usual pattern of behavior, you should carry out preventive work, and people who care about you will also help well here. It is necessary to periodically ask relatives for constructive criticism, which allows not only to bring down arrogance, reduce the imaginary crown, but also to build a new way to improve themselves. Spend the nightly reflection of your own motives and impulses, sifting out those generated by desire for fame and approval. If you think about this phenomenon a little more, it may turn out that there is a lack of not empty confession, but a specific praise or even an embrace of a close one, and perhaps the wound caused in childhood closes. With the right approach, it is possible to establish the true causes, and not just to struggle by force of will with the investigation - it will take more time on its own, in the assistance of a psychologist, the work will be more intensive.
If you have already decided to deal with vanity, then you have recognized the presence of this deficiency in yourself and represent the negative consequences of further developments in this vein. Try to keep a reminder with poison all the time, to which such behavior has already led, as well as options for possible consequences (examples of literature and cinema, as well as biographies of famous personalities, perfectly illustrate this subject).