Psychology and Psychiatry

How to influence people

When a person is interested in how to influence people and manage them, many people forget about ethical aspects, freedom of expression of their own will, as well as possible consequences. Therefore, before proceeding to the description of various psychological characteristics and methods of influence, I would like to note the negative sides and warnings. So, if one influences a person constantly, inclining him to certain decisions, not only his volitional function is frustrated, but also the core of the person himself, who lives opposite to his convictions, is destroyed.

It makes sense to think about how to influence the psyche of a person with favorable consequences, contributing to his development or improvement of mood. The main influence is not the actual information presented to the person, but the emotions that arise in the process of interaction. The response does not happen by itself, there is a mass of factors, and as a result, you can say extremely unpleasant things, causing sympathy to yourself. The intonation palette, verbal signals and certain anchors that exist in the psyche are used for influence.

The information embedded in the subconscious has a strong influence - then the person will not only obey and follow the necessary prescriptions, but will independently build a harmonious line of conduct.

Psychology of influence on people

There are many tricks of psychological perception that help to figure out how to influence other people. There is even no need to use certain techniques and tricks, but it is worth remembering the very characteristics of the psyche and in time to edit their behavior or features of the presentation of information, and you can use randomly emerging circumstances.

One of the most interesting points in the peculiarities of the perception of others is that the presence of weaknesses and weaknesses that are not critical for social norms and morals make a person more pleasant for others. This allows you to relax and stop striving to achieve excellence in everything - when a person is near, you also want to be alive.

So, if you show fatigue at the end of the working day, you will cause greater trust in the team, and if you come in imperfectly ironed clothes or with stains of paint, then you will not doubt the sincerity of your words.

Ideality causes tension and distance, and the presence of small flaws makes you closer to people. From close and confidential distance, you can afford much more, and the information will not be subjected to harsh criticism.

The second point to achieve the location - treatment by name. A proper name is the sound that a person is accustomed to hearing most often, responding at a behavioral and emotional level.

Appeal by name in turn can cause a person to strain - they immediately recall school lessons and comments, as well as workshops. The name is something sacred, and the more often you refer to a person in this way, the calmer and more trusting you will be with you, and therefore much of the information you have said will immediately fall into the subconscious. However, it is worth not to overdo it, because frequent reference by name can cause a backlash of tension and mistrust.

The construction of your requests can also be adjusted regarding the characteristics of a person's perception. Try to avoid direct formulations, use interrogative intonations instead. The best option is when you yourself give the person a choice of what to do, but at the same time limit it to those options that suit you personally. Those. when you need help in the garden and things collected from dry cleaning, then you should ask what person chooses to do with these items. In this context, the opportunity to refuse is removed in advance, and the number of elections is reduced to the categories you need.

When it seems that a person will resist to some decision or influence, then it is worth discussing with him only minor issues, without questioning what is necessary for you. In the case of a trip, you can argue about the timing, transport and amount of baggage, but not the fact of travel. This technique works even with children, distracting from the conflict point - the morning fees may include wrangling over the clothes and the person who carries the backpack, then the idea that there is an option not to go to school is excluded.

Another option is how to achieve the desired - just ask a lot and inaccessible, and then lower the bar to the level necessary. A person who refuses a big request may feel guilty, the desire to get rid of which is quite strong, so if you immediately offer him the opportunity to pay off less, consent comes almost instantly.

People influence each other even with passivity, for example, a long pause makes a person tell more about the previous topic. The awkwardness of silence is tolerated psychologically, and social norms require constant dialogue, so if you deliberately delay a pause, the interlocutor will be forced to fill it with something. For the topics of such fillings, the last discussed question or emotional experiences of the interlocutor are usually chosen.

Generally try to speak less, giving another the opportunity to speak out, to indicate their position. Not only that everyone prefers to be listened to, but this is still not enough in our world, therefore, they immediately gain confidence in a good listener, telling more and more. Even if you have more experience and more accurate knowledge of an issue, still listen - you will receive information about the person himself and his life concept, and the questions asked in time will help turn the conversation in the right direction.

Such a feature allows to establish close contact, that a person feels that he is being listened to, when what he said is paraphrased, returns the same information, slightly modified in form, but not in meaning. Gradually, you can add your own ideas to the voicing of the interlocutor's text (everything that you add will be perceived as your own thoughts).

These are the main features of the human psyche, allowing more and more to be influenced: the maximum level of trust to the interlocutor and the manifestation of their freedom. The more you master the art of evoking trust and creating an opportunity for a person to choose and the illusion of control of the situation, the more power you will receive not only over actions (which can be forced), but also the motivational and emotional sphere (only inspiration is needed here).

Ways and methods of influencing people

There are certain techniques that allow you to influence further attitudes or behavior of people, and they are described in the literature, have been repeatedly discussed by psychologists and sociologists, but still continue to act. Even if a person has long been aware of the moments of special influence, he will still be exposed to him, the only thing that can change is the degree and timely awareness of manipulative influence, but the necessary feelings will have time to occur, and some actions may never reach the level of consciousness.

The classics of influence are the ability to make a friend out of an enemy with the help of a request. When it is useless to negotiate, and it makes no sense to measure strength, only positive methods of cooperation remain. Naturally, a direct offer can only cause wariness or aggression, so it is necessary to ask a person at a most neutral position for a certain service that is good for you, but rather simple to do for him. Lend a pen, ask for an address, ask for help to bring the box to the office - such small things, made with care, are being hampered by a competition or dislike program.

Choose words according to what the person thinks about themselves, even if they do not coincide with your view of the situation. At some points it may resemble flattery, but if such speeches fall into the very point of self-perception, then you may be the first person to evaluate the other as he always saw it. As everyone seeks to surround himself with like-minded people, then after the exact characterization of the person himself you can say whatever you want, this will also be perceived as true.

To get closer to trust you can try to reflect not only the human perception of the world, but also its physical manifestations. Copying posture, speech rate and voice volume are the basics of neuro-linguistic programming, which really works. The system is based on the fact that after appropriate copying of gestures and other manifestations of a person, you can begin to bring in your influences, and already he will repeat your movements and thoughts, as you specifically did before.

This mechanism is built at a high level of self-importance, when others copy our behavior - at the animal level, the whole pack tries to adapt to the manifestations of the leader. So, with the influence, it is possible to use not only logical components, but also evolutionarily laid unconscious mechanisms. When you communicate with a person, show your participation and understanding of what they are talking about and your joint dialogue - nod, press, repeat the last words and use other techniques that confirm your active participation in communication.

The important point is the choice of emotional interlocutor, when making a request or proposal. So, a tired person is unlikely to refuse, rather, he will postpone the decision making to another day - while the chances of a positive outcome increase. In a good mood, a person quickly agrees to simple and understandable requests, where he is not required to solve the current moments and think about how best to proceed. Therefore, if you have a ready-made concrete plan that requires only permission, then wait for a high spirits, but if you need to solve several obscure questions, then choose the second half of the day when people are tired.

Try to start small - please read the article or walk with you to the nearest office, listen to a song or visit a free exhibition. Such actions leave the feeling that the person has already done something in the necessary direction, i.e. when you offer to visit the paid continuation of the free lecture, he will agree more quickly. The main thing in this phased approach is to observe pauses, stretching each step for several days or weeks. Two principles work here at once - pauses, during which a person will have time to think about what is happening, to feel obliged, and also to evaluate his own efforts already invested. It is always easier to give up on where your own energy has not yet been sent than on a worthless process where at least time was invested.

Look for what is beneficial for a person and start with positioning his interests, since the main motivation is personal motivation. When it is impossible to find anything. What can be given to the interlocutor (emotions, titles, a sense of belonging, or the removal of feelings of guilt), then use two direct effects, which sometimes work where all the techniques of influence are powerless. The first is a polite request, captivating with its sincerity, openness and intelligence. Many, subject to frequent manipulations, more than ever appreciate it is an open appeal. The second option for such fair treatment - cash payment of the desired result. Such a business approach is able to resolve many conflicting moments and make even former competitors cooperate.