Philophobia - It is the fear of falling in love, which includes a high degree of fear of an emotionally positive attitude towards another person. Philophobe is afraid of intimate and sincere feelings directed at another individual.

Philophobia often occurs in people who are interested in it. Often in their dreams, they connect their happy existence with love, but for some reason in real life they suppress this desire in themselves. This is because, after suffering only once, the soul no longer desires love.

Philophobia causes

In view of the fact that the feeling of love arises spontaneously or spontaneously, it is a philophobe and is afraid of this feeling. The memory of previous relationships, when love turned the deep qualities inside out, and only good ones, does not allow a person to fall in love again.

Philophobia develops after the lovers leave for some reason and their souls are filled with emptiness, and then overcomes depression after parting. The overwhelming depression after parting is due to emotional attachment to a person and disappointment in love. Therefore, a philobob and is afraid to fall in love again, be disappointed, feel after parting apathy, bitterness, auto-aggression, irritation, resentment, helplessness, sadness, as well as a decrease in vitality. All these painful memories inhibit the opportunity to fall in love again, because a person is afraid of being rejected again and does not want to experience all the sensations associated with love breaking.

The reason for philophobia can be the following:

- future elects are unable to compare with past love;

- a slight deviation from the past perfection is incapable of accepting a philophobe and a compromise in this case becomes irrelevant;

- a person who is afraid of disappointment excludes prolonged contact with the opposite sex;

- murder within the family;

- fear of being lost in a partner and therefore losing its immunity;

- the arrival in the family of a cruel or indifferent stepfather, stepmother;

- The appearance of a younger child who took all the attention of the family;

- leaving one of the parents to another family because of falling in love;

- in adulthood, the philophobe is frightened by the material forthcoming responsibility for the object of love;

- fear that love will bring misfortune;

- fear of imprisonment, as well as independence;

- rape of a woman;

- people who have lost a child in a happy marriage;

- Often the fear of falling in love is born in childhood with the help of parents who suppressed the personality of a small child in everything and injected an unformed consciousness with a negative attitude towards the opposite sex. Over time, in adolescence, the image of the ideal of a loved one emerges, but the invented peak is never achieved. The unformed person does not understand this, because the ideal is formed from poetry, books, films. The collective image of the ideal companion is preserved in the subconscious and becomes a defense against life. A baby, growing up, will never introduce an imperfect person into its life. From this comes shyness, insecurity, difficulty and anxiety during contacts;

- fear of physical imperfection, namely dysmorphophobia, which occurs after treason, as well as the sudden detachment of a loved one;

- change of life values: career, professional interests, personal freedom;

- fear of losing a loved one or personal freedom;

- often the fear of falling in love arises from those in need of this feeling, and indicates the need to realize the inner potential of the individual.

Thus, philophobia makes people unhappy and doomed to loneliness.

Philophobia symptoms

Philophobia is marked by panic fear of falling in love or love. Fear pushes the obsessed person to unknowingly or consciously destroy any relationship at the initial stage. Philophobes highlights the fact that they feel comfortable enough with members of the opposite sex, to which they cannot become attached and fall in love.

Often, matured philofobes as spouses or partners give preference to those who show contempt for them, mockery and not manifest obvious physical abuse. This attitude makes it possible for people suffering from philophobia to feel safe with such people, but in their preference they are still lonely.

Philophobe is recognizable for the following symptoms: closeness from the outside world, avoiding open questions, avoiding flirting, redness, indecision, awkwardness, stuttering, anxiety, confusion of phrases.

The individual is often indecisive, he lacks the will to constancy, there is a panic fear of the opposite sex and the opportunity to experience repeated torments of love. For a philophobe there is a victim complex or an aggression complex.

The victim’s complex includes the following feelings and emotions: humiliation, resentment, sadness, helplessness, frequent sad memories. The intensity of female sacrifice is much higher than that of the male. Philophobe often feels helpless, and also appears incapable of overcoming all the consequences of what happened. A person often blames himself for parting and gets angry for not being able to predict the course of events in time.

The complex of aggression includes a sense of injustice with self-accusation, as well as a form of auto-aggression. It is common for each individual to love, but the fear of loving at the Philophobe takes up, and it dominates. To understand this state can help psychologists. The development of philophobia is explained by unfortunate previous relationships, as well as situations from childhood.

The behavior of the philophobes can be called somewhat strange. Loneliness as well as childlessness is not the only unpleasant consequence of a strong mental abnormality. People can also commit a conscious disfigurement of themselves: refusal to use cosmetics, care for themselves, disfiguring themselves with scars, burns, tattoos; consciously bring themselves to the last degree of obesity, making their appearance repulsive; change as individuals, for the worse, show obvious aggressive actions in relation to those they like; they turn into home sadists who think they love their partner much more than they would like.

An interesting formula was discovered, according to which the classical philophobe acts, and also builds its relations. Choosing a partner in the same way as all people, he expects attention from him, evidence of love, interest, but as soon as a partner shows them, the philophobe immediately pushes him away from himself.

Philophobia treatment

It is important to realize that a person is social and love is an integral part of the life of any person. Do not consciously refuse love. Of course, the experience in love is different, but it must be perceived normally. No matter how a relationship is formed, it is experience, inner progress, which allows you to look at yourself and the world in a different way. When a person loves, fear retreats and a loving person acts without thinking, easily achieving what he previously feared. Those people who do not experience philophobia understand that experiencing love will win much more than they lose. Because for them, love is an opportunity to express themselves in different directions. The task of psychotherapists, psychologists is to explain to a person that love prevents sober talk only for the first time, and over time the emotions subside, and one should not be afraid of it.

Love is a tool that removes internal clips, solves complex problems, but for this to happen, it is important to accept with all your heart the person who gives this state, stop being afraid, trust him, but do not forget about yourself as an independent person. Having opened up in love to a new person, the individual knows himself better, improves himself. Having experienced an unrequited feeling, a person grows up and gets the opportunity to move forward without fear.

How to get rid of philophobia?

Philophobia needs a patient’s trusting attitude towards a psychologist, a psychotherapist who can help him. Consciousness-conscious conversations have an impact on philophobia, which help the patient to understand the personal problem, as well as completely get rid of it.

The prognosis for philophobia is favorable. Irreversible and complete healing occurs in ten cases out of eleven, which testifies to the success in the treatment of philophobia.