Psychology and Psychiatry

How to survive parting

How to survive the separation? This question worries many people who have had a separation on the initiative of a loved one. All instances of parting unite emotional pain, disappointment, longing, inner discomfort, apathy, and anhedonia. It is very hard to survive parting with your loved one, if you managed to have a strong emotional attachment to your chosen one, and forced separation became inevitable.

How to survive the separation can be understood by understanding the mechanism of liberation from love psychological dependence. Parting with the beloved is the suffering of the soul for the person to whom the deep feeling of love originated. Each person individually experiences separation and it depends on the emotional state, desire, willpower, and the type of nervous system.

In a state of separation, it is important to understand yourself and accept what happened. Thank fate for those wonderful moments that you had in life with your beloved. Believe me, life does not end there, time will pass, and you will remember this period much more calmly. If it so happened that the separation was difficult, and the love relationship was characterized by affection by the patient, then the feelings about this would drag on for a long time. Attachments are good when partners need each other, but as soon as a gap has occurred, it is necessary to reorganize into a new life as soon as possible without a loved one.

How to survive parting with your beloved

Having understood the components of love, it will become clear what to do with its consequences and how to survive parting with your loved one. Psychologists note the following stages of emotional love attachment: the emergence of desire, love and affection. The participants of the love drama are endorphins, dopamine, serotonin. By the most malicious member of a romantic relationship include dopamine. With a high emission level of dopamine, there are feelings of elevation and brightness. A love object gives pleasure by its presence, communication, closeness. These sensations want to receive always and in large volumes. It should be noted that romantic (dopamine) love has an ending, and is not able to last forever. The whole cause of biochemical reactions in the body, which fade with time, leading to reduced attraction.

People who are addicted to dopamine love, after three years, become frustrated with their chosen one, and their love ends. In this case, it is important for an abandoned person to realize that he is not bad at all if you parted ways with him. Just your companion has ceased to experience the pleasure of staying near you. In this regard, there is a large number of divorces in the first years of life of young people.

How do people survive parting

It is not a secret for anyone that one of the basic needs of an individual is the need for love. But as soon as your mind begins to realize that you and your love have been betrayed, reality is perceived in gray. Because of this, depression rolls in, and it is very difficult for the body to restructure and accept the changed conditions, since the brain is still absorbed in love memories.

At first, after parting, the experiences seem unbearable and painful. Women can randomly run tears, they look unbearably looking at couples in love, wedding processions. Men also suffer, but try not to submit views to others. In the future, they categorically forbid themselves to fall in love again, thereby trying to protect themselves from new sufferings. Sometimes men unconsciously begin to revenge all women: falling in love with them purposefully in themselves, and then abruptly throwing.

The period of parting may be marked by severe depression with prolonged symptoms, as well as the following signs: motor retardation, depressed mood, pessimistic outlook on life, loss of interest in everything that happens. Depression is marked by a decrease in self-esteem. To relieve discomfort, people often resort to the use of alcohol, as well as other available psychotropic substances.

How do people survive parting? Psychologists noted that after parting with loved ones, people regret not for them, but for those emotions and sensations that they received from their partners. Therefore, a person shows pity and selfishness about himself.

Studies have shown that parting is often a severe psycho-emotional shock, leading to frustration, psychological discomfort, as well as a sense of humiliation and loss of self-worth.

Parting undermines a person's deep convictions about loyalty, love, and family. At the same time, feelings, emotions, and a system of beliefs, beliefs, and worldview become wounded.

The results of studies of people in the period of separation showed the prevalence of two models of behavior - the aggression complex and the victim complex. The complex of aggression is marked by the emotions of bitterness, bitterness, irritation, desire for retribution, revenge and auto-aggression.

The victim’s complex is characterized by apathy, resentment, humiliation, helplessness, sadness, reduced vitality, and painful memories.

A person feels helpless, as well as incapable of overcoming the consequences of separation. Often blames himself for what happened and the inability to predict the development of such events in time. In women, the severity of sacrifice is more prevalent than in men.

The aggression complex occurs due to feelings of injustice, as well as forms of auto-aggression and self-accusation.

Among other signs of experiences, there are: emotional numbness, suicidal tendencies, a sense of hopelessness, global inhibition of feelings, psychosomatic symptoms. Often there are difficulties in the performance of everyday household or official duties.

The experience of separation leaves an imprint on all subsequent relationships. Having survived a psychological trauma, people do not enter into new relationships soon. Often, a person suffers from loneliness for a long time, but does not make any attempts for a new acquaintance due to internal unreadiness.

How do women survive parting

It is often hardest for women to experience separation, and therefore they turn to specialists more often. Some women are experiencing along with the torment of parting and love dependence. As for men, they are much less likely to be subject to such traps. Love addiction is marked by a suffering destructive state and has much in common with drug addiction. The sad experience of parting for many ladies does not pass without a trace, and many women are forever disappointed in love and in the ability to build new relationships.

Surviving the separation from your loved one can be facilitated by a psychologist who will deal with a woman in her painful experiences, correct distorted perceptions and attitudes regarding herself: “I am bad,” “I am a failure” and so on. The goal of the psychotherapist will be to raise self-esteem and return a positive self-image.

How do men survive parting

Men are also able to experience strong feelings, but they do not openly show their pain, so parting is often not easy for them. Most men find solace in work, in alcohol, in fast driving, in new relationships and erratic relationships. Thus, they drown out the heartache.

At first, it is very hard for men to forget their love, and they try to instill this feeling as deep as possible, turning into more closed people. Many men mistakenly believe that a short affair or a new relationship can help to forget the woman he loves. Intim relieves stress, and also brings physical pleasure, but it does not fill the void formed after parting with your loved one. Over time, the possibility of returning to his beloved is not excluded, but the return will depend on the circumstances in which the gap occurred.

It is easier for a man to endure separation when the solution to the gap was mutual due to the exhausted relationship.

How to survive parting - tips

The advice of a psychologist, how to survive parting with a loved one, includes not looping on your problem. Of course, it is necessary to speak out to a close person who will listen to you, take your side, support you and then distract from dark thoughts.

You can make another attempt to resume the previous relationship in order not to regret in the future about your indecision. Thus, you still calm yourself and the fact that you should not feel sorry for the man who does not value your relationship and does not want to be with you. For yourself you will make the main conclusion: from now on you will not be on the way and from this day your lives will run parallel and only if necessary intersect.

How to survive the pain of separation? Of great importance is the desire of the person himself to get rid of their experiences. Use these simple tips: get some exercise; chat with friends; often walk in nature; meet new people; change image; travel; make repairs at home; do not retire for long; attend exhibitions, museums, theaters; Enrich the menu with products containing serotonin (eggs, fish, nuts, honey, raisins, chocolate, fruits, seafood, vegetables); go on holidays; master self-massage, art therapy, avoid sad thoughts, read positive literature, mentally release the situation and build a new life.